Apologize?!

It has come to the attention of the country that the wife of Justice Clarence Thomas has been reported as having sent a voicemail to Anita Hill asking her to apologize for her testimony during his Senate confirmation hearings.

I hardly know where to begin.

In terms of intelligent ideas, I'd like to list a few that ranked higher than that:

"Let's return to our base of occupation by marching in a straight column down a clearly marked road, with plenty of cover for firing positions down either side of that road, after every rebel in the country we occupy has been informed of where we will be marching!"

"Let's charge straight into the teeth of a massed army of artillery, rifles, and small arms after we've been here for 3 days and have alerted our enemies to exactly where we will be attacking next."

"Let's fill a giant cylindrical shaped balloon with an extremely explosive gas, cover the outside of that balloon with the same material that future generations will know is an ideal component for solid rocket boosters, and then fly that balloon into a region that is know for experiencing electrical storms."

By the way, if any of the 3 readers of this blog have missed the historical references I cited above, then you are not nearly as clever as I have given you credit for. You are invited to explain otherwise in the comments.

We Love Marcy!

Marcy Kaptur, the opponent of Rich Iott, aka Der Fuhrer, has been running ads featuring a World War II veteran praising her accomplishments in bringing benefits to WW2 vets and ensuring the WW2 memorial came into existence.

This, after pictures surfaced of Mr. Iott posing for pictures and smiling in a Waffen SS uniform.

Subtle as a sledehammer.

Marcy Kaptur has been good to Northwest Ohio over the past several years. And I was insulted when this TEA party hack tried to unseat her. This SOB who is about as qualified to hold high political office as Woody Woodpecker.

I hope you get beaten 90 to 10, Mr. Iott. It is ridiculous to think that anyone with a reasonable modicum of intelligence would ever vote for you. The only reason you will get any votes at all is that there are a LOT of stupid people in this world.

Very Disappointing

I happened to be on IMDB.com a few minutes ago and I saw the returns of movies over the weekend:

Jackass 3-(D): $50 million
RED: $22.5 million.

I don't know what is more disappointing: The fact that enough people in this country are fans of the Jackass franchise to spawn not one, not two, but THREE movies, or the fact that this 3rd Jackass movie managed to out-perform a very funny, very clever movie starring 2 Academy Award winning actors by a factor of more than 2 to 1 at the box office.

I've said it before and I'll continue to say it again, as many times as it takes: I weep for the dying IQ of this nation.

Type A Positive

That's my blood type, folks.

I don't think I'm giving away too much personal information by telling you, the three readers of this blog, that information.

I am a regular whole blood donor. And as of this morning, I have voluntarily donated 72 pints of whole blood. For those keeping score, that's 9 gallons of whole blood donated over the course of the last nearly 20 years.

There's not a lot of things in my life that I am too proud of, but that's one of them.

72 pints means I've helped save the lives of as few as 72 people, and as many as 216 (each pint of whole blood can save from 1 to 3 people. By the law of averages, that's 2 people per pint. Not too shabby.)

Also please remember that the average adult human body contains approximately 6 pints of blood. So I have now donated the equivalent of 12 times my total blood supply.

I was also once what the American Red Cross calls a "CMV Hero", meaning my blood did not contain the antibodies formed when you contract what is called Cytomegalovirus. This is a virus that causes a mild fever in any normal healthy person, but can cause severe danger to persons with compromised immune systems, like premature infants, transplant patients, or cancer victims (like my mom was, God rest her soul), for example. I don't know if I still am one (most people never even realize they get this illness, since it is so mild in any normal, healthy person) but it gave me a good feeling when I learned it. It still does, to some extent.

I encourage anyone reading this to become a volunteer blood donor. It only takes about an hour out of a normal day. The process is completely safe. And it really doesn't hurt as much as everyone thinks. Of course, if you donate as often as I do, you tend to develop scar tissue on your vein, which makes it hurt more than normal.

But that is a small price to pay. And you get a good feeling when you realize how easy it can be to save someone's life. Believe me, I know.

Right in Rich Iott's Face!

When der Fuhrer sez, "Ve iz de master race!"
Ve "Heil" (thplbtt), "Heil" (thplbtt), right in Der Fuhrer's face!

Yes folks, the immortal words of Spike Jones. (the original).

Why, you may ask, am I quoting Spike Jones?

Well, it seems that Rich Iott, Repuglican candidate for Ohio's 9th congressional district, has been photographed numerous times wearing the uniform of a Waffen SS officer, which he apparently donned repeatedly to re-enact WW2 battles.

I hardly know where to begin.

First of all, I have yet to understand the appeal of re-enacting war battles. World War 2 was a massive cataclysm that engulfed nearly the entire world in death and destruction. It saw the deployment of one of the most destructive weapons ever conceived by man. It saw the rise to power of a vicious and cruel dictator who oversaw the deaths of over six million innocent people. And now, a Repuglican candidate for THE CONGRESS OF THE UNITED STATES has been revealed to have regularly donned the uniform of one of that madman's most loyal footsoldiers in the name of "reliving history".

If his opponent, Marcy Kaptur, had any sense, she would simply sit back and let the media pick this man clean to the bone. She hasn't done this yet. I hope she will. Soon.

Mr Kasich Goes to Hollywood

The Ohio gubernatorial race currently stands between incumbent Governor Ted Strickland and challenger John Kasich.

Kasich has, for reasons passing understanding, held a commanding lead in every poll for months now. He has done this by accusing Strickland of allowing hundreds of thousands of Ohio jobs to be lost under his watch. Never mind the fact that these jobs were lost due to policies enacted under George W. Bush and a Republican Congress--Policies which plunged this country--and the world--into a recession the likes of which has not been seen since the Great Depression.

And never mind the fact that Kasich left his job in Congress to go to work for Lehman Brothers. You may recall what happened to them.

Now Kasich is back in Ohio, saying that his Wall Street experience is exactly what Ohio needs to pull itself out of its economic slump. How in the hell is this man polling above single digits?!

I realize that there is a general backlash against all Democrats after people found out that the mess created by Duhbya and his cronies couldn't be fixed overnight. I don't know why that surprised anyone. It took FDR eight years of massive government spending on Federal programs to lift this country out of the depths of the Great Depression.

Now, in Kasich's latest commercial, he has a paid Hollywood actor posing as an out-of-work steelworker accusing Strickland of costing Ohio its steel jobs. Now bear in mind that this is an industry decimated by cheap imports and hopelessly outdated manufacturing techniques. But that's not the point. Kasich apparently was unable to find a real steelworker to speak out for him, so he resorted to a paid actor (and not a very good one at that--maybe that's why he thought people wouldn't catch on).

Governor Strickland has spent the last 4 years trying desperately to hold this state together with both hands. I was proud to have voted for him. I will be proud to do so again.

As for you, Mr. Kasich, go back to Wall Street and see how many more banks you can run into the ground.

Can Someone Please Explain?

As of the writing of this entry, the latest polls show that the voters are prepared to elect a minimum of 48 Repuglicans to the Senate, with God knows how many Congressmen.

I have to ask: Why?!!

A Repuglican Congress, led by Duhbya as its cheerleader, enacted the policies that have planted our economy in the position it is in today.

And now people want to go BACK to those same policies?!

To blame is the Supreme Court, (under the unwise leadership of a Chief Justice who is so stupid he couldn't remember the words to the Presidential Oath of Office) which decided that corporations are citizens, with all the free speech protections therein. Wholly supporting that decision are the Neo-cons who equate money with free speech, and who think labor unions have equal spending power with corporations.

This election will see Repuglicans win 9 out of every 10 offices that they run for, after being fully bought and paid for by their corporate sponsors. Mark my words.

The most long-term damage that the Presidency of George W. Bush created can be summed up in 3 words: Roberts and Alito.

Welcome to government of the Corporation, by the Corporation, and for the Corporation.

You Don't Mess With Brutus

Last Saturday, Ohio University played Ohio State University at football. It was a typical matchup of a perennial powerhouse against a sacrificial lamb that almost always happens in pre-conference play in college football. The result was predictable--Ohio State won the game 43-7, with Ohio's only offensive touchdown occurring well into the 4th quarter when OSU had sent its deep backups into the game.

What was NOT typical, however, was the behavior of OU's Mascot: The Bobcat.

Before the start of the game, as the two teams were running onto the field, OSU, led by its mascot, Brutus, witnessed the Bobcat tackle Brutus not once, but twice, and wrestle him to the ground.

It's become a popular viral video. And everyone outside of Ohio may have enjoyed a good laugh about it.

But not here in Ohio. And not us Buckeye fans.

You see, this person in the bobcat mascot costume may have thought it was funny to tackle Brutus. And he (or she) may have thought they might have scored some fan points for doing so. But I have a message for this person: There are 100 Buckeye fans to every Bobcat fan!! And we don't like what you did!

You deserved to lose your status as Ohio's mascot. I got your mascot battle right here, bitch!

1000 Ways to Die

I was surfing the web today, and I stumbled across the SpikeTV Network series "1000 Ways to Die".

This is, apparently, a half-hour series dedicated to displaying methods by which people across these United States have met their demise in quite spectacularly stupid ways.

Attention readers: If you try to find these videos on-line, you should be warned that the depictions of these deaths is about as graphic as you're going to find on non-pay-Cable.

I personally think this show should be renamed "1000 ways to earn a Darwin Award.

And I seriously think that TV has really gone too far. The show I watched featured, just to name a few, the graphic demonstration of a man accidentally blowing the bottom of his jaw off, the decapitation of a couple after accidentally hooking their tongues together via tongue piercings, and a man tripping and accidentally driving a meat hook through his throat.

I will NOT link to this episode. If you really want to see it, then go to the SpikeTV link above and find it.

I realize that the Spike network is an attempt to hook male viewers by glorifying all things male, but I fail to see why the producers of this show think men like me can be entertained by watching depictions of gruesome deaths.

If I wanted to see that, I would watch Saving Private Ryan again. By the way, if anyone missed the message of that movie, it was that war is nothing more than a way to cause the brutal deaths of thousands, and that it is something that should be avoided at all costs. If you can think of another interpretation, please let me know.

I Have a Particular Interest

Any of the 3 regular readers of this blog know that earlier this year I spent a glorious week of vacation in Hawai'i. I've never had a more pleasurable experience. I was in a state of bliss from the moment I exited the Honolulu airport in February and immediately stripped down to a t-shirt and threw my winter coat into the trunk of the rental car. I even had no problem riding a public transit bus back to our hotel after returning said rental car. I'm a veteran of the public bus.

So I had a particular interest in this week's premiere of Hawai'i 5-0. I wanted to make sure that they treated the state fairly as I knew it.

This isn't the first time a TV show or movie has used Hawai'i as a substitute for a tropical wilderness. I can't begin to count the number of times it has been represented as Africa. The TV show Lost was filmed nearly in its entirety there. And I have no problem with it. Hawai'i is, in its current state, basically a third-world country masquerading as a United State. Most of the state is dominated by tropical wilderness. And it is pretty much entirely at the mercy of mainland exports--including tourists--for its livelihood.

Despite all this, the citizens there have adapted. They have perfected the art of extracting dollars from tourists. They are not alone in the practice of this art.

I might also point out that they have managed to produce a United States President. Despite the claims made by the Tea party, Barack Obama was born there. The number of states that can claim their place as the birthright of an American President is pretty small. Bravo, Hawai'i, for joining the club.

I'm about 16 years away from retiring. I hope to revisit your state on my retirement trip. And I love any show that has a chance of making you more prosperous. Maybe things will be cheaper the next time I visit.

Death to Marco's!

There is a local Pizza chain named Marco's Pizza. I have ordered from them many times. Hell, I WORKED for them for a couple of years way back when.

I've been satisfactorially served by them every time I placed an order.

Until last Friday.

I called in an order for 2 small pizzas with sausage and extra cheese. The coupon for which was in my possession. I figured I'd eat a few pieces out of one pie, and bag the rest up for future consumption. I do that a lot.

I picked the pizzas up on my way home from work. I neglected to open the boxes to check them, as I almost always do. When I got home, the pizzas had no sausage. Boneheads.

I took them back. The store insisted that I had ordered only pizzas with cheeses. I was forced to wait 15 minutes while they remade them. I was not offered a refund, a discount, or even a coupon sheet.

I have eaten the last Marco's pizza I will ever eat. And I encourage the 3 readers of this blog to never order from Marco's, if it ever becomes available in your area.

One of the most common axioms of business is that it costs 6 times as much to replace a regular customer as it does to keep a regular customer. Good job, Marco's. And good luck replacing me.

Or anyone else I tell this story to...

No "Yanks" for Delaware!

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the Republican Nominee for the open Senate seat from Delaware:



As near as I can tell, she hasn't changed much in the last 20 years. (In case you were wondering, the title of this post is my attempt at helping her choose a campaign slogan. Think she'll like it?)

Seriously, folks, the inmates are running the asylum.

The NRSC has announced that they will NOT be supporting her run, financially or otherwise. Basically they are saying to the Tea Party lunatics that got this woman the nomination: You cooked this rancid meat. Now eat it! We're putting our resources behind someone who actually has a chance of winning.

I have a gut feeling that all of these T.P. (pun intended) folks are going to get a rude wake-up call come November. And it's going to hurt. A lot.

But suppose they don't. Suppose every T.P. backed candidate (and there are a lot of them) wins? What do these folks think is going to happen? Do they think the corporate lobbyists won't immediately start whispering in their ears? Do they honestly think that they will operate any differently from the ones who are there now? I think that they will actually be more vulnerable to influence from corporate lobbyists, since, from what I've seen, these T.P. candidates are mostly utterly unqualified to hold the elected offices they aspire to. After all, how can they help but not be? Look how unqualified to hold high office the leader of the T.P. is.

(*cough* Sarah Palin *Cough)

By the way, I have a question for Christine O'Donnell: You believe the bible forbids masturbation. How, exactly, would you enforce a ban on same?

The mind boggles...

UPDATE (9/16): The NRSC has caved to the T.P. and announced that it will support her candidacy, to the tune of at least $42,000, and several prominent Repuglicans have announced that they support her candidacy. The T.P. says squeal like a pig, Elephant, you Squeal!

Utterly Ridiculous

It is ridiculous. Ridiculous. RIDICULOUS, I say. The fact that a crazy Florida preacher with a congregation of 50 people can virtually take the world hostage and hold it to his whims.

The mere fact that he managed to manipulate world events simply by merely threatening to burn a book publicly is simply astonishing. It has invited comments from the President, a three-star general, the United Nations, and various other notables from around the country, and, indeed, around the globe.

And it is entirely the fault of the society we live in today. This society, with its social networking sites, Youtube, and 24 hour cable news. 20 years ago, maybe even 10 years ago, if this lunatic had announced his intention to publicly burn the Qu’ran, more than likely the reaction of the few folks who were around to hear him at the time would’ve probably been, “Meh. Who gives a shit?”

But not in today’s world. A world where rumors can spread all over the world via text message with a speed that would make a wildfire green with envy. Where anyone with a camera phone and a Youtube account can be an instant internet celebrity. Where tens of thousands spread gossip around the globe via Twitter within seconds. And where the cable news outlets, desperate to fill 24 hours a day of programming, latch onto any juicy story they find from these sources and inflate its prominence into something hundreds of times more than it ever should be.

This...creature...in Florida made a simple threat. And through the power of the internet, he was able to hijack the agenda of an entire nation. And we’re all to blame for it. We let this exploding genie out of the bottle. And now we have to live with it.

I’m not saying it’s entirely a bad thing. The internet, and, by extension, Youtube, text messaging, and Twitter, has many useful functions, on a societal, governmental, economic, and humanitarian level. But for every useful function you can think of, you can probably think of at least 10, 100, or even 1000 harmful ones. I’m not sure that’s an acceptable trade-off.

A REALLY Bad Idea

So. Apparently some evangelical church in Florida has announced its intent to hold a Qu'ran burning day this Saturday on the anniversary of September 11th.

This, on the list of stupid ideas, ranks right up there with leaping out of airplane without a parachute, tying a side of beef to yourself and jumping into a shark tank, and jumping rope while walking through a minefield.

Of course, if this happens, the media will be there to cover the whole event, in the name of ratin--er, I mean, "keeping the public informed".

Of course, these people have every right to burn as many copies of the Qu'ran as they want to. Although they might want to think about what Jesus would think of their desecration of the word of God in the name of religion.

I am not a Muslim. I never have been, and I never will be. But one out of every 6 people in this world is. And I would imagine that the majority of them would be offended to see the symbol of their religion burned publicly in front of the world's media.

So I have this to say to the "Reverend" Terry Jones: How would you feel if you saw someone burning a bible?

I would also say this: You have the right to free speech. But you do not have the right to shout "Fire!" in a crowded theater. And while that may not be what you are planning to do, our American military personnel are deployed in not just one but two crowded theaters right now: Afghanistan and Iraq. And what you are planning to do is the equivalent of tossing a Molotov cocktail into the front row of both of those theaters.

You are also playing right into the hands of the very people who inspired those who flew planes into buildings nine years ago, and on the very anniversary of it.

So why do it? Are you really that convinced that it's a good idea? And how were you convinced of this? Seriously?

I will wait for your answer.

And I have this to say to the national media: STOP COVERING THIS!!! You are just adding fuel to the fire! I realize that you have to fill a 24 hour news channel with something, but the only way to stop people from saying and doing things that are objectionable is to stop paying attention to them.

I Would Buy This

It seems that a startup company based in Seattle has come up with easily installed, do-it-yourself Solar Panels that can be purchase for an average of $700 dollars each.

Think about that for a minute. For the cost of a home appliance you can buy a solar panel that you can install that will hang over a window, or a door, like an awning, with a cord that you can plug into any outlet of your home. And it will feed the power it generates back into the electrical grid.

And this is not a system that you have to spend $20,000 on and hire a team of experts to install--this is a system that (presumably) you can install yourself using step-by-step instructions and basic hand tools. And you will recoup the cost of it in four years or less. AND, most importantly, the system is portable, meaning that if you move, you can take it with you.

A few years ago, my neighbor went to the expense and trouble of having solar panels installed on his roof. He uses them to heat his water. It never made any sense to me to do the same, since the 200+ foot tall Oak tree in my neighbor's back yard blocks the sun from shining on my house for most of the early day and a goodly portion of the early afternoon (something I am very grateful for in the Summer). But for most of the afternoon and evening, the front of my house is in direct sunlight. 2 or 3 of these panels would, I think, reduce my electric bills considerably. I even have the perfect location for them.

And I might actually be able to use my front porch for a change.

So if this company is a success (and I see no reason for them not to be, other than corporate greed), I hope they will soon offer their products for sale at my local hardware store.

I'll be one of the first in line to buy them.

It's An Outrage

The new division format for the Big Ten (now up to 12 teams) was announced today. As per usual in college football these days, the almighty dollar has prevailed.

You see, in order to secure more money for itself, the Big Ten TV network has ensured not only that it will have a Big Ten championship game to broadcast, but that there will be a chance that there could be a second OSU-Michigan game.

You see, OSU and Michigan will be placed in separate divisions, and, although they will still meet in the last regular season game, there is also a chance that they could meet in the championship game that follows.

The thinking behind this, of course, is that since the rivalry between UM and OSU has been voted as the greatest rivalry in college football, and that the ratings for their annual game are always spectacular (ABC broadcasts it every year nationwide), then what could bring in more money other than a second meeting between the two?

Of course, the "thinking" behind this is flawed. The last few years notwithstanding, "the game" has often decided the Big Ten champion. It's been the source of thousands of bets, monetary or otherwise. It was the showcase for one of the most storied rivalries in college football, one that one can be described to any fan using only 3 words: Woody versus Bo. It's a rivalry that really brought college sports into the limelight as a valuable source of income for many schools.

But that has really become the problem. College football has steadily become less and less about getting kids the education they need and more and more about making money hand over fist. It is money that is the reason College football sticks with a bowl system that grows more ridiculous every year (there is now about one bowl for every 3 division 1A teams) and rarely leaves anyone happy with the result (By my count, the Bowl Championship series has worked exactly once--when undefeated OSU played undefeated Miami in 2003). And it is money that is the reason the Big Ten is setting up a system wherein OSU and UM could meet twice within the span of 3 weeks or less.

I realize that it is hard for any university to have a profitable football program. The costs associated with fielding a football team every week of the season are astronomical even for the largest schools. And every dollar that the schools must pump into athletic scholarships deprives them of one less dollar to provide scholarships for non-athletes who may be far more deserving of it.

But allowing money considerations to diminish the greatest rivalry in college football history, a rivalry that has included such legendary names as Howard Cassidy, Archie Griffin, Art Schlichter, Rex Kern, Desmond Howard, Deion Sanders, and Eddie George, just to name a few, is an outrage and an insult to the millions of fans (myself included) who voted that same rivalry the greatest one in college football.

If colleges were serious about keeping their costs down, they would demand that the NFL fund the scholarships for all Division 1A players. It is only fair, considering that the NCAA football system is really nothing more than a free minor league system for the NFL. Not only would this help them keep costs down, it would also help more students attend college.

Which would help everyone.

I Don't Have to Try

This afternoon, I walked into the middle of a conversation between some of my co-workers. I caught the last snippet of conversation (paraphrased):

Co-worker #1: I think people who try to make other people look stupid are insecure themselves.
Co-worker #2: You mean people like Eric (me) here.

Now, of course this was said jokingly, and I took it in the playful spirit in which it was intended. But it set me thinking.

Because, you see, in this day and age, no one has to make someone else look stupid. They are doing a fine job of it all by themselves.

Hell, there are entire TV shows dedicated to showing people making themselves look stupid. From Amazing Rac to Wipeout. From Jersey Shore to Jackass. Seriously. Who watches a show entitled Jackass?! Well, for starters, I think the title of the show is a pretty fair indicator of the show's main audience. Oh, and if you are a fan of Jackass, then you are forbidden from ever reading this blog again. Then again, you're probably illiterate, so you can't read it anyway. The mere fact that a 3-D movie sequel to Jackass is soon to be released makes me fear for the future of this country. Then again, the number of things that make me fear for the future of this country may be too numerous to count at this point.

So no, I don't have to try to make people feel stupid. Nor do I. But it is occasionally amusing to see people who are ready, willing, and able to do it to themselves.

Playing Right Into Their Hands

It would seem that all the frenzy that has been stirred up over the proposed building of an Islamic community center a few blocks from NY's ground zero has apparently played right into the hands of Islamic extremists.

In a course of events that should come as no surprise to any sane, rational, intelligent person, it would seem that the furor and protests being stirred up by the radical right over the proposed community center is being cited by an extremist Imam as a textbook case of America's intolerance toward the Muslim faith.

And really, can you think of anything that is currently being said or done that is doing anything to discourage that?

Sadly, we seem to be growing short on our supply of sane, rational, intelligent people.

I feel that it is germane at this point to quote the First Amendment of the Bill of Rights:

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."

Take a careful look at the first right enumerated in the first sentence. Pay close attention to the words "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion." Freedom of religion--the right of every citizen of this country to worship as he or she sees fit--is the first right enumerated in the bill of rights, listed before such monumental freedoms as freedom of the press or speech. Most of our founding fathers had firsthand experience with the tyranny that could arise when the state decided to establish a religion for itself, and they wanted to make sure that such tyranny could never happen here.

That is why it makes me shudder to see the way the religious wright is so easily able to co-opt the political agenda in this country. And why I can't help but think that our founding fathers must be spinning in their graves when they see it.

Up in (Fiery) Arms

Apparently there is a fuss being raised over the video released for the latest song by Eminem entitled "Love the Way You Lie".

Now, since I truly hate people who rush to judgment over something before they have seen/read/listened to/etc. it, I went on-line and watched the video. Note: I will NOT link to it here. I ain't your damn search engine. Go to YouTube and search "Eminem Rihanna".

So I watched it. And may I say pairing "heroin guy" from "Lost" (I came to refer to the characters on the show by my nicknames for them since they seemed to get killed with such regularity and it was hard to keep track) with Megan Fox may be one of the more unusual on-screen couplings I've seen. And I have to say that this may also be the best type of role for Megan Fox i.e. one that she doesn't actually have to recite any lines spoken aloud, and can rely on her ability to look scorchingly hot rather than her acting talent (or lack thereof). Although her performance still seemed badly acted and forced...

But back to the video. The video shows shots of what one assumes to be a typical white trash couple fighting, making up, fighting again, making up again, and then (presumably) one or both of them dying in a house fire one of them set. It's very "The Burning Bed"-like.

Some people, it seems, are up in arms over this. They seem to think it glorifies domestic violence. They seem to think it glorifies alcohol-fueled fights. They seem to think it glorifies using homicide as a solution to domestic violence.

I seem to think these people are idiots.

Wake up you morons! It's a music video. Nothing more. And may I also say that this video glorifies neither domestic violence or homicide. And anyone who says otherwise has obviously never seen it. That's all I'm going to say on the matter.

Except to say this: What is it with the pairing of rappers with regular singers? First there's Katy Perry and Snoop Dogg, and now Rihanna and Eminem? What's next? Run DMC and Aerosmith?

Oh wait. That's already happened...

(By the way, Steven Tyler is one seriously ugly person. I'm guessing his daughter thanks God every day she didn't get her looks from him...)

He Said it Better Than I Could, Continued

Well said, my friend.

(Note: I tried to embed the official MSNBC video, but it never seemed to work. Hmm...)

Bravo, Mr. President

President Obama has given a speech defending the planned building of an Islamic community center near the area where the World Trade Center once stood. And he gave this speech despite overwhelming criticism of the idea.

It is a move that will make him more unpopular. And it is a wagonload of fresh meat thrown to the conservative blowhards that have been screaming about him from the day he took the oath of office.

It is also a move that gives me a glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, this President might finally be willing, in some small way, to start sticking to his principles.

This country was founded on the principle of religious freedom. It is the first right enumerated in the first amendment of the Bill of Rights (Look it up). And like it or not, there are over a billion Muslims in this world. And the vast majority of them are good, decent people who were appalled by the attacks of September 11th. Millions of Muslims live and work in this country. They defend it every day in the armed forces, the police, and the fire departments of our country. And they know that while the monsters who flew those planes into the WTC, the Pentagon, and a field in Pennsylvania may have claimed to be Muslims, they were about as far removed from the true Muslim faith as an anthill is from Mount Everest.

Look, the group that proposes the building of this mosque is dedicated to improving relations between Islamic countries and the west. And I can't think of any better way to do that than to ensure that there is a place where people can learn the true meaning of the Muslim faith mere blocks away from where people who were an abomination of that faith committed a horrific act against our country.

Something You Think Is a Joke

You see pictures posted on the internet that look like this:



You think they are jokes.

But they really aren't:



If you have any doubts, please read the news report here.


I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that news of incidents like these come from the South...

Yeah, I said it. Get over it. Or secede. Ask your ancestors how well that worked out.

Jet F@#& You!

I doubt that anyone in the world right now has not heard of the Jet Blue flight attendant who, after being struck on the head by luggage being taken from an overhead bin, cursed out the passenger who did it on the P.A., grabbed a beer, opened an emergency exit from the plane, popped the emergency slide, and, well, quit his job rather emphatically.

I've flown on my share of airplanes. I've watched many times as my planes arrived at their gates and 3/4ths of the passengers in them immediately stand, fill the aisle(s), and grab everything they've stowed in the overhead bins and expect to get off the plane within the next five seconds. I've been hit by more than a few bags dumped unceremoniously on the seats below them. News flash folks: It ain't gonna happen! Pressures have to be equalized. Jetways have to be docked and leveled. And the luggage bins have to be unloaded so that transferring luggage can be moved to planes that may be on the other side of the airport before they take off. Believe me when I say that they don't always succeed. These are the things that demand the priority of the ground crews.

I realize that people are lauding this man as an oppressed hero of the put-upon flying class. But please stop to consider for a minute just how many problems his actions caused.

Also consider what might have happened if this man had tried something while the plane was in the air...

The Teen Choice Awards

So. Apparently the Teen Choice awards were handed out last night. Or so I’ve heard. As you’ve probably guessed, I wasn’t exactly glued to my TV watching them.

But, as far as I can determine, these would seem to be roughly the equivalent of the poor man’s People’s Choice awards. Now, don’t get me wrong: I have great respect for the People’s Choice awards. They tend to represent the views of the general public at large, rather than the views of a bunch of snobbish movie critics and other Hollyweird types. Typically, the movies nominated for Best Movie on the People’s
Choice list tend to out-earn their counterparts on the Academy Awards list by an average of five to one. And, while you occasionally see an occasional blockbuster from an Oscar winner, this tends to be the exception, rather than the rule. The most obvious reason for this is that the People’s Choice awards are based on polls of the American Public at large, while the Oscars are based on votes from a select group of Hollywood elites, who generally tend to believe their tastes are far, far above those of “ordinary Americans”

But when I hear about the Teen Choice awards, I am given cause to stop and ponder. Like the PC’s, the TC’s are awarded based on the results of an on-line poll. And, while I have never voted in this poll, I have to believe that not a whole lot of care is taken to ensure that only the votes of people between the ages of 13 and 19 are counted in this poll. After all, we’re talking about an internet poll. And if there is one thing that is universally true about the internet everywhere, it’s
that it allows for total anonymity. I’m sure that if I had taken leave of my senses and decided to cast a vote in this poll, there would have been nothing to stop me from doing so. Hell, I’m almost tempted to cast a vote in the next poll just for laughs. Almost.

So the TC’s are really nothing more than just a lighter version of the PC’s. Another excuse for Hollyweird to throw another ridiculous party and show themselves off in fashions most ordinary Americans wouldn’t be caught dead wearing.

The awards themselves, of course, are nothing more than negotiating tools the stars who won them can use to wring a few more millions out of the Hollyweird brass when they are negotiating the salaries for their next movie, or their next TV role, or their next album. Oh, and the awards are a joke: They are shaped like surfboards. REAL surfboards. 6-foot tall SURFBOARDS!

This years big winner in the movies category was, naturally, the latest Twilight movie. After all, how could millions of hormone-crazed teens (and probably more than a few internet predators pretending to be hormone-crazed teens) NOT vote for a movie starring, apparently, 3 of the most beautiful young people in Hollywood.

An aside: I managed to last through about 20 minutes of the first Twilight movie a few months ago. Then, I turned it off. And spent the next ten minutes looking for an ice pick or other suitably long, thin, sharp object that I could jam into my head in order to permanently lobotomize the part of my brain that carried the memory of that anal excretion of a movie. Fortunately, I soon gave up on my search and simply drank a heroic amount of alcohol. It helped, for no other reason than it killed enough brain cells to dim the memory. The movie sucked, is what I’m saying, in case you didn’t get it.

So the TC’s have now come and gone. Hollywood has patted itself on the back again. And I have to believe that no one outside of Hollywood gives a rat’s ass. I sure don’t.

Once Upon a Time

I have only been in one serious relationship with a woman. Please be advised that when I say "serious relationship", I mean one that lasts more than 2 months.

She was a co-worker. I know that office relationships are doomed the day they start. But we fit well together. We were both reserved, both non-committal, and both working in jobs that we didn't enjoy. But this was a good relationship. Due to circumstances outside our control, however, we both knew that it couldn't last. And no, before you ask, it wasn't because we were having an extramarital affair. Sheesh! You people have dirty minds. But it was fulfilling for both of us while it lasted.

I live in Toledo, Ohio. It is one of the worst cities in America for a single person to live. This is a town that consists of either people who are married, or people who move here after they get married. For reasons passing understanding.

I have hit middle age as a single with a vengeance. I have resigned myself to the fact that I will probably live my life that way. This is due to a combination of factors including, but not limited to, my age, my external appearance, and my overall negative disposition towards others.

If things ever happen to change that, well, then that will happen.

I Don't do Facebook

I do not have a facebook page.

I do not have a twitter account.

I do not use myspace.

I, apparently unlike millions of others desperate for their share of the 15 minutes of fame, do not crave attention like a crack user seeking a rock. This is the only way I can think of to describe these millions of facebook, twitter, and myspace users who lust for as many online friends as they can get their cyberspace hands on. Never mind the fact that most of these users will never actually have face-to-face contact with the people they connect with electronically--it is also highly unlikely that any of these people will also actually carry out an actual verbal communication with any of their so-called cyberfriends.

This, my friends, is the biggest part of my problem with these services. These so-called "social networks" are actually doing the opposite of what they may have been originally intended to do: They are discouraging the development of basic social skills.

Add on to this that it is a known fact that these services are often trolled by predators, sexual and otherwise, looking for vulnerable victims. Victims, I might add, who are not exactly making themselves hard to find. The amount of information some of these people are willing to share about their lives makes me shudder.

I have actually become quite surprised with myself that I write this blog. I've been doing this for more than six years now, and there have been times when, quite frankly, I have shared some of my more intimate thoughts with the 3 people who read it.

An aside: I often refer to "the 3 readers of this blog" in many posts. I have no idea the actual readership. I've gotten comments every now and then. Its existence is not advertised anywhere but in my e-mail signatures.

It is important to remember, however, that I don't write in this blog for attention. I write it so that my personal thoughts, experiences, and opinions will be available somewhere other than in my own head. Over the past 6+ years, I have written some things here that I am, at various times, proud of, scared of, ashamed of, and, quite frankly, confused by. But this is what I have written. I will never delete anything, rewrite anything, or do anything other than make minor grammatical edits to anything I have written or will write here.

So now, climbing off my soapbox...

Let me conclude this post with a little story: I have heard that there is a program available on facebook that allows you to plant, cultivate, and harvest "virtual vegetables". I have no idea if this is true. But if it is, let me ask this of the people who spend time doing this: Have you ever pondered turning off your computer, going outside, tilling some dirt in a garden plot, planting real vegetables, harvesting them, and making yourself a nice dish?

I grow tomatoes every summer. I enjoy using them to make my homemade spaghetti sauce. Try it sometime. It's really delicious!

The TEA Party

The so-called Tax Enough Already party has just expelled its leader for apparently calling the NAACP a racist organization.

I'll give you a few minutes to let the irony of that statement sink in.

These Tea Party folks really, really hate it when the government takes their money and uses it for frivolous things as paying people their social security benefits, keeping the country's infrastructure intact, making sure the armed forces are paid, and cleaning up the mess created by a massive underwater oil spill. Of course, they have no problem when these things happen under a Republican administration. Or when said administration spends billions it can't afford to invade, conquer, and occupy another country.

To the members of the Tea Party, let me say this: You are a bunch of useless hypocrites. You are all a bunch of fat white racist twits who not only can't stand that a Democrat resides in the White House, but that he is also black.

To the Southern Tea party members: The South lost the war. Get over it. Someone always loses a war. If you don't want that someone to be you, then you shouldn't start wars in the first place. And yes, you DID start it. Check the history books. The Southern states seceded, and they fired on Fort Sumter first, which is the battle that started the civil war.

To the Northern Tea party members: Your ancestors are spinning in their graves. They fought and died to free an entire class of people being held in soul-destroying servitude. And now, a century and a half later, when one of their descendants holds the highest office in the land, you associate yourselves with people who are no better than those who once wore white robes and pointy hats and burned churches in the name of God! How can you possibly be proud of that?!

Is This the Definition of Irony?

Think about it for a second: A picture of a Polaroid camera taken with the very instrument that basically made it obsolete--the digital camera phone.

By the way? $10 for a camera that no one can use because hardly anyone can find film for it any more. Maybe if they paid me $10, I might take it off their hands.

Drain it Out

The three regular readers of this blog know that I recently spent a week on vacation in the beautiful state of Hawai'i. And in the course of that visit I took a tour of the USS Arizona Memorial, where I found the name of a deceased sailor who had the same initials as mine.

For those of you that have never visited the memorial (I will assume that's everyone) you should know that a tiny trickle of oil still leaks from the remains of the ship constantly. It's considered to be the tears of the dead, or possibly the ashes of the fallen,

But I recently saw a documentary about the sunken ship. And it seems that the small oil leak from the sunken fuel oil bunker has the potential to become something much worse. It seems that after nearly 70 years of lying sunken in 70 feet of salt water and 20 feet of mud, there is the possibility that this leaking oil can become a deluge.

I know that there is considerable reluctance to desecrate the underwater tomb of 1177 dead sailors, but let me say this: I really don't think they will mind if we sink a hose into their tomb and try to prevent a major biological disaster.

I'm just sayin'.

Harvey Pekar (October 8th, 1939-July 12th, 2010)

Those apparently in the know in the world of underground comics are mourning the death of Harvey Pekar. If you have no idea who I'm talking about, I'm not surprised. He was the author of the underground comic book series American Splendor.

This series was unique in that it did not feature an heroic crime fighter or an avenging vigilante of some sort. No, it simply featured Harvey. Being, well, Harvey. Every day. It was his life as he knew it. What made it interesting was that this guy had a life that was, shall we say, less than interesting. He lived alone. He worked as a file clerk at a V.A. hospital. He collected Jazz records. He got mad at people. A LOT.

But people were eating this comic up. Maybe it was because they were sardonically funny. Maybe it was just because people liked to read them and think to themselves, "Hey, my life may be bad, but at least I'm better off than that guy.

But these comics made Harvey's life better. He met his future wife because she was a fan. He appeared on David Letterman many times (until he got tired of being Letterman's punching bag and told him off on national TV). And then, a few years ago, an HBO movie was made about his life.

Now, HBO doesn't make very much that's bad (Although I really didn't get the point of Entourage. Seriously. It's a series about an actor and his three hanger-on friends who go around Hollyweird trying to get laid all the time. And they made a series about this?!)

But I digress. HBO usually makes quality films, is what I'm saying. And I'd been wanting to see this film ever since I read this review a few years ago.

(By the way, he's not really naked. Trust me when I say you should be thankful for that)

So I resolved that the first time I found the film in the library I would check it out. So I did a couple of years ago. And I took it home and didn't watch it. I do that a lot. Mostly because I'm usually too busy watching my West Wing DVD's.

But this past Saturday, I found it again. It might have been fate trying to tell me something. So I checked it out, and took it home where it would probably not be watched again.

But then I read today about Harvey's death. So the first thing I did when I got home was watch the movie.

It's brilliant. Paul Giamatti plays Harvey spot on. And the way you know this is that the real Harvey Pekar narrates the film. And even acts in it a little. And most of the film's scenes were taken from Harvey's comic books, and since they are basically about his life, any movie taken from these books can't help but be pretty accurate.

But perhaps what makes the movie even more poignant now is the fact that I knew as I was watching it that the person being portrayed is now dead. At one point in the movie, while undergoing treatments for cancer, Harvey asks his wife if, since he is a guy who writes about himself (I'm paraphrasing) in a comic book, when he dies, will his character go on living, or will he just fade away?

I have never read any of the American Splendor comic books. And, since I'm sure that with Pekar's death the price of back issues will inflate exponentially, I probably never will.

But I salute you Harvey Pekar. Somehow you managed to take a dull and meaningless life and turn it into something better simply by doing the one thing you were apparently very good at: Telling people about your life.

You are my idol.

The First of 2 Envelopes

I've been pondering lately the current Administration's efforts to dig this country out of the mess it was left in by the previous administration and congress. Most of these efforts have been partially effective at best. And with the Gulf oil spill only making matters worse, this Administration may never accomplish a tenth of what it hoped to accomplish.

I am reminded of a story I was once told about a new Russian premier. I'm sure the story isn't true, and I don't remember exactly how it went, but here is the gist:

The premier of the Russian government resigned in disgrace after his country suffered a major crisis. On his first day on the job, the newly appointed premier walked into his new office. On his cleaned off desk, he found 2 envelopes left for him by his predecessor. On one of them was written, "Open this envelope the first time something goes horribly wrong. The second envelope said "open this envelope the second time something goes horribly wrong.

So, not too long after he took office, something went horribly wrong. The premier opened the envelope. In it was a single piece of paper on which was written, "blame it all on me". The premier followed the advice. And he thanked his lucky stars that the man who came before him had been so smart.

A few months later, something else went horribly wrong. The premier opened the second envelope, hoping to find another way out. In the envelope was a second piece of paper. On it was written simply, "Time for you to prepare two envelopes.

I don't know how much longer Obama can keep reading the piece of paper from the first envelope.

It'll Never Happen Again

I was flipping through the pictures I downloaded from my camera phone and I came across this little number:



So why did I happen to snap a picture of an envelope sitting on the edge of a box, you may ask? Well, Chester, I'll tell you.

The reason I took that picture is this: The box it's sitting on is an empty paper box I keep near my desk for recyclables. On this particular occasion, I happened to flip that empty envelope towards the box. And--I swear to Almighty God this is true--That's where it landed. Perfectly balanced, on the edge, with nothing on either side holding it up (it's hard to tell from the picture I admit, but there's nothing inside the box supporting it, I promise). That box is nothing more than a standard paper box, with sides 3 millimeters thick, if that.

So, I snapped a picture. If I could have shot a video of that envelope as it landed there, I would have done that too.

I don't know what course of events conspired to control the flight of that envelope so that it landed perfectly balanced on the edge of an open box. It's a shot I could never make again in a million tries. It's a shot Larry Bird couldn't make in a million tries. Go ahead--try it some time. Take a standard empty #10 envelope, seal it shut, cut the top open with a letter opener, and flip it about 5 feet through the air and try to get it to land perfectly flat on the edge of an open paper box. Then try it again a hundred more times.

You'll never do it.

I am Dying

Well THAT got your attention, didn't it?!

Seriously, though, I think I am slowly boiling to death in the liquefied remains of my own organs.

It is REALLY hot here.

The daytime temperature is in the upper nineties. The humidity is above 60%. Mix this and stir and you get a heat index of over 100 degrees. Walk more than 2 blocks outside in this weather and you can't help but feel like you've just taken a shower in hot, dirty, smelly water.

You'd think after more than 30 years living here, I'd be used to it by now. But every year seems to get hotter, wetter, and more unlivable.

This may be a product of global warming. This may be a product of getting older. This may be a product of random summer weather fluctuations. It may be a combination of all these factors, plus a few more that I haven't thought of.

What's the solution? Where do we move to? The only state of the union that I've ever visited that has a consistent climate is Arizona. That state has 5 days of rain per year, and the rest of the time it experiences constant desert temperatures. Not my cup of tea. Plus I might get deported to Sweden after getting stopped for speeding and not being able to produce proper citizenship documents.

What? Too soon? Before you complain, Arizona, you deserve all the bad jokes you have coming your way. I'm not the first. I DEFINITELY won't be the last.

It's Finally Happened

So, I've finally gone and done it.

You see, I needed a new cellphone. My old flip phone broke, and in order to get a new one, I needed to stick with Verizon, a company I hate. Note: There is no cellphone company I don't hate. Just to be clear.

And, as I approached the phone sales kiosk, I had in my pocket a coupon for $130 off of an LG Ally.



(By the way, to get that picture here, I needed to photograph it with my regular digital camera, download it to my computer, and upload it to this post. The phone has a great camera on it. Its only limitation is that it can't take a picture of itself. With all the advances in technology, no one has ever been able to invent a camera that can take a picture of itself. Probably because there's not a big demand for it.)

So I bought it. With the coupon, it was free. It's the internet service that costs $30 a month. On top of the phone service.

In addition, this phone has the ability to find out where I am at all times.

This phone has done a lot for me. I can pick up NPR on the phone and listen live. I can type in any song title and hear it in seconds. I can get addicted to Sudoku--wait, that's not a good thing.

Seriously. Do not get involved with Sudoku. You'll never be able to stop.

But I am now officially watched by Big Brother. Willingly. God help me.

Edit: Oh. Have you seen those new Droid commercials? The ones that feature a human eye frantically trying to follow dozens of images, before finally becoming a robotic eye?

How far off can it be?

The Good Guys

For many months now I have lamented on the dearth of watchable TV shows coming out of Hollyweird.

But for many Monday nights now I have enjoyed the new summer TV series The Good Guys.

First, it stars one of my favorite actors from The West Wing, Bradley Whitford, sporting a completely real molesterstache.

Second, it's well written. That's an extreme rare in this day and age of "reality" TV. It can't be easy for the regular networks to come up with pre-scripted material.

Third, this series does not make the mistake of trying to take itself seriously. That is a surefire recipe for success.

Long live The Good Guys!

So I saw it

In a previous post, I questioned whether or not I should see the new Karate Kid. Well, events of the week prevented me from posting my opinions.

And here they are.

I saw it. I was entertained, which is rare for me when it comes to what is coming out of Hollyweird these days.

I was also amused by the little touches, which were an homage to the original: The instructor at one point spreads car wax on his car. He reads the instructions on how to compete in a tournament. He uses chopsticks to catch a (dead) fly.

I also couldn't help comparing it to the original time and time again. The protagonist gets in trouble originally over a girl. He is nearly beaten to death (and rescued by his future instructor) after pulling a prank on his tormentors that goes wrong. He is forced into humiliating repetitive labor that he grows disgusted with, only to learn that it is an important part of his training. He discovers that his instructor is hiding a devastating secret that is only revealed after finding said instructor strongly intoxicated.

It's all there.

But it was still entertaining.

And I recommend this to anyone who has not seen the original. You will enjoy it.

For everyone else, your enjoyment will be dimmed by the constant comparisons. And you may not find it as enjoyable as you could have.

It is not Right

Today I attended the funeral of the six year old daughter of a co-worker. She died from the injuries she sustained after being struck by a car.

She was six years old.

She was six years old.

SHE WAS SIX YEARS OLD!!!!!!

It is. Not. Right.

Every time I attend a funeral, I hear the same themes: They are with God now. They are in a better place. God has a plan. We will move on.

This was a funeral for a six year old. God couldn't wait a few decades?! A better place? What better place is there than growing up in a home with parents and siblings who love you?! A Plan?! What kind of cruel God takes a six year old girl away from parents who love her?! What kind of sick, twisted plan is that?!

At times like this, these are the questions that we ask.

During the sermon, the priest brought up the troubles experienced by Job. As everything good in Job's life was stripped away, he cursed himself, his life, and the day he was born. The one thing he did not curse was God.

I do not curse God. But I question His wisdom on days like this. And I wonder about His plan. Why is He so cruel to those who praise Him?

Maybe someday I will know the answer to that question. Maybe.

A Decision to Make

For months now I have been grappling with a difficult decision: do I go to see the new Karate Kid?

In the first place, the title is wrong: it should be the Kung Fu kid. And I realize that Karate and Kung Fu are both westernizations of Oriental martial arts that have existed far longer than Hollyweird has been aware of them.

Second, I watched the first Karate Kid more times than I care to count, both in theaters and on video. Hey, what can I say: I empathized with the story: a high school nerd, picked on by bullies. I only wish there had been my own version of Mr. Miyagi to defend me. It might have gotten me a lot farther than I am today.

Third, I can't help but think that I can't watch this movie without comparing it to the original. As will anyone of my generation.

In its defense, this movie features an actual 12 year old playing a 12 year old. (Ralph Macchio was 22 when he played a high school sophomore). The movie also stars Jackie Chan, who has starred in dozens of martial arts themed movies, and frequently performed his own stunts. Pat Morita, who portrayed the original Mr. Miyagi, readily admitted that he knew little or nothing of the martial arts. His stunts in the movie and its sequels were performed by doubles.

I have to decide if i will see it.

Future updates will tell.

Why?

Today, I learned that my former boss, a former Republican elected official, apparently jumped to his death from the fifth floor of a Hospital parking garage.

Note: I will use no names or other specific references in this post. Those who want to know who I am talking about can find out easily enough.

I currently know next to nothing about the circumstances. This was a man who, at 53, apparently decided that it was not worth going on.

As of this writing, it is being considered a suicide. The fact that it happened in the parking garage of a hospital is telling. I will wait and see if anything further develops.

I am sad, angry, confused, and devastated, in no particular order. This man ran the office I worked in for 14 years. He was well-liked by almost everyone who worked for him. When he lost his job, It was a blow to nearly everyone there, myself included. It should be noted that I don't like many Republicans. I liked this guy. He wasn't afraid to put politics aside and do the job he was elected to do. It's an attitude that probably cost him his job.

I can't imagine what can drive a person to decide that it is no longer worth the effort to continue living. I hope that I will never reach that decision. I have family and friends. And a dog.

We Love You Ah-Nuld!

Ever since Arnold Schwarzenegger became the Republican Governor of California, I've refused to watch a single one of his movies. Fortunately, this really hasn't been much of a sacrifice since most of his movies sucked dirty ass water.

But recently, he said something that may just redeem him in my eyes:

"I was also going to give a commencement speech in Arizona. But with my accent, I was worried that they would try to deport me back to Austria. So I canceled that idea right away."

Oh mercy, that's funny.

I must admit I'm of a mixed mind about this legislation recently passed in Arizona. On the one hand, I'm definitely opposed to illegal immigration. But on the other hand, I'm opposed to legislation being passed that allows--in fact forces--the police to accost any citizen with brown skin walking down the street and demand that they produce proof of citizenship. It's the first step on a dangerously slippery slope.

Think about it for a minute. Do YOU carry around proof of your citizenship? I don't. The closest thing is my driver's license. Which may not be enough. Someday.

They Served Too

Today is the day we honor the fallen members of our Armed Forces.

The question I ask is how many have fallen who have been given no honor at all.

Let's start with:

Blacks: During the American Revolution, any black soldier who fought in George Washington's army was promised his freedom, and generous payment for it. This promise was frequently never kept. Many of them were even returned to slavery after their service.

Women: Women served actively in the military during every war since the Revolution. And yet most of the time their service was never recognized or rewarded. In most cases, it was often ignored.

Homosexuals: The case of Margarethe Cammermeyer springs immediately to mind. This is a woman--not American born, but a naturalized citizen--who dedicated her life to serving America as a military officer. But when she revealed she was a lesbian, she was immediately dishonorably discharged. The narrow-minded military policy against gays once again deprived it of a valuable asset, a college-educated, highly skilled nurse, for no other reason than her sexual orientation.

On this day, when we remember our fallen military heroes, let us also pause to remember those who will never have a chance to receive the same honors, because they were simply born at or of the wrong place, the wrong time, the wrong gender, the wrong race, or the wrong orientation.

A Random Thought

Today I had a random thought, which I think has potential.

Today we were treated to the theatrical release of Prince of Persia: Sands of Time. This movie is apparently based on a popular video game.

An aside: Why would the movie's makers cast Jake Gyllenhaal as the titular character of the movie?! He's about as Persian as Woody Allen! I realize that having a popular actor helps out at the box office, but surely there is some well-known actor of Persian descent who could have filled the role...

But I digress. In the past few years, we have seen a number of movies derived from immensely popular video games. In no particular order, we have seen often more than one film based on Mortal Kombat, Doom, Resident Evil, Max Payne, Street Fighter, Tomb Raider and Final Fantasy, just to name a few. The list gets bigger if you include animated movies produced in Japan.

The movies themselves have met with generally mixed reviews. It may be impossible to make a movie that lives up to the expectations of the fans of a game that is loved by millions, or tens of millions, of fans.

But my thought was this: why not try tapping the people who make these games, who obviously know how to create popular entertainment?

There's a chance this has already happened. Maybe some of the people who create these wildly popular games already work in Hollyweird.

But, given what's coming out of there these days, I seriously doubt it.

Meanwhile, I'll keep waiting for the adaptation of Half-Life. It's got to come eventually...

Why is Anyone Surprised?

Anyone who has followed the news over the past few weeks has watched as BP has tried--and failed--many times to cap the uncapped underwater oil well that is spilling tens of thousands of gallons of oil into the Gulf of Mexico every day. They have also watched as the government has stood back and waited for them to fix the problem, using everything from drilling a second hole into the gushing broken well to cap it to trying to use a giant concrete condom to cap the gusher. Nothing has worked--yet.

Why are people surprised that nothing has worked?

Companies that tap our planet's natural resources to produce energy have only one interest in common--to get as much profit as they can out of the ground with as little expense as possible. Safety be damned.

We have seen this happen time and time again with coal mine disasters. Miners die, inevitably as a result of safety cutbacks. And now we have seen an offshore oil rig that failed as a result of shoddy safety practices. And that failed offshore rig is continuing to pump oil into the Gulf. It is guaranteed to become the worst environmental disaster in history. The Gulf states may never recover from it.

But the corporations will survive. Because they always do.

The Lost--cops out

OK so it had no choice.

What else could it be but a cop out?

It turns out he was dead all along. Lame, lame, LAME!

It could not possibly have lived up to the expectations everyone had.

I should expect no less from the man who took the Gene Roddenberry Star Trek Universe out into the courtyard, tied it to a tree, gave it a cigarette, and executed it.

I'm talking to YOU, J.J. Abrams!

OK What the Hell?!

THAT is a finale?!

Please post a comment if you think the finale of LOST sucked the sweat from a dead bear's anus.

Are. You. Kidding. Me.

Edit 11:11 PM Well the finale has gone past the normal ending of prime time. We will wait...

A Glimmer of Hope...Dashed

Official results of yesterday's pivotal primary and special elections were announced today. On the morning news.

An aside: As a Democrat-leaning independent, I have to say I'm mostly pleased with the results yesterday. Particularly in the Pennsylvania Senate race.

But I digress. This morning, as I wandered into the office, I caught a snippet of conversation between two of my female co-workers. I picked up the words "vote" and "last night".

Finally, I thought to myself. It's finally happened. The people in my office have decided to take an interest national politics. My tireless work to get these people interested has paid off! I was ecstatic.

The feeling lasted about ten seconds.

As I wandered over to join the conversation, I realized as I got closer that they were talking not about the results of yesterday's elections, but about voting on American Idol. I should've known better than to get my hopes up.

I weep for the dying IQ of this nation.

An Obama Assassination Geometry Lesson

It seems that a geometry teacher in Alabama has used a theoretical assassination attempt of President Obama as an example in his geometry class.

I really don't know where to start.

Threatening the life of the President is a Federal offense. I don't care how innocuous it may have been. This guy should go to jail. I can't imagine what the outcry over this would be like if a geometry teacher in a high school in, say, Massachusetts had done the same thing using George W. Bush as an example.

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. This is, after all, in Alabama, which produces politicians like this.

I weep for the dying IQ of this nation.

Crystal Crazy

My city of Toledo has gone completely Crystal Bowersox crazy.

This American Idol winner wannabe came to Toledo today, performed at an Open air concert (where she apparently showed up late and sang two songs and then left), went to the Ottawa County fair, then returned to Toledo to sing the National Anthem at the Mud Hens game (the Mud Hens, by the way, will ALWAYS be more famous than any American Idol contestant), and then ran back to Hollyweird.

She is NOT from Toledo. She is from a place in Ohio called Elliston. Search for it on the web. You won't find it. You also won't find it on any current map of Ohio. That will no doubt change after this year. It's an "intersection town". If you are driving down a two-lane highway and come to a stop sign, you will see a few houses scattered nearby. That's what this town consists of. That, and a couple of churches.

I have NEVER watched a single episode of American Idol, and if I never watch an episode of the show, I will consider one of my life's goal's fulfilled.

I have probably said this before: I imagine the following meeting in FOX's production office:

"Hey! I have an idea for a show! Let's send out a call for every no-talent hack in the country to come and audition in front of cameras while singing badly over-produced Karaoke. We'll get a trio of judges with no power to change anything that will include a snarky English guy, a fading Pop star, and a token Black man that no one has ever heard of to choose the people that get to face up to whichever faction can manage to muster the most artificial internet and text votes to keep them in the game.

The sad part is that this show has become one of the most popular shows in the nation.

I weep for the dying IQ of this nation.

The Fuglies

Attention any female readers of this blog: I am about to be a shallow, insensitive prick. Stop reading NOW!


Are they gone? OK, good.

The president has announced his nominee for the next supreme court justice:



Yes folks, meet Elena Kagan.

A woman who, not to put it mildly, looks like she took a nose dive out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.

(I did warn you!)

The Democrats seem to want to select the ugly ones: Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Janet Reno, Nancy Pelosi, Teresa Heinz-Kerry. Don't get me wrong--there are a few exceptions.

Meanwhile, Republicans have ones like Ann Coulter, Michelle Malkin, Laura Ingraham.

I guess that having a soul and a conscience apparently weighs you down enough that the warts start to show.

It must be easy to be cute if you don't care about the welfare of others.

From the Department of Redundancy Department

I was at my dad's house today, and I was flipping through the cable TV channels, looking for something that would convince me to get cable (as I have done many times before, without success).

On the Fox Sports Channel for Detroit, I encountered a baseball game between the Indians and the Tigers. The Channel info described the game as being "MLB Baseball".

MLB stands for "Major League Baseball". So the channel info stood for "Major League Baseball baseball."

I weep for the dying IQ of this nation.

It's Not Right

Today I took one of my occasional (about once a month) trips to Costco. I needed to stock up on a few things.

Two of those things were cans of V-Fusion juice and cans of Coke. If you've never tried V-Fusion because the whole vegetable thing scares you off, then don't sweat it--The stuff is great! All you taste is the fruit juice (This commercial announcement NOT paid for by Campbell's!)

But my problem is this: 24 11.5 oz. cans of V-Fusion cost $15. 32 12 oz. cans of Coke cost $9.

An 8 oz. glass of V-Fusion contains a full serving of fruits and vegetables, contains only natural ingredients, and is extremely good for you. A 12 oz. can of Coke is...incredibly NOT.

You have to pay twice as much for the healthy products as you do for the unhealthy ones. Is it any wonder most people tend to take the easy way out?

Ballbuster Video

Recently I have heard news that Blockbuster Video rental has encountered financial problems. I couldn't be happier.

You see, a few years ago, I was a BV member. I rented videos from them regularly.

An aside: Those of you younger folks may have heard stories of how us geezers would sometimes make trips to video rental stores. There we would pay a small fee to obtain copies of movies released on VHS tape, take them home, watch them 1 or 2 times, and then return them to the same rental store so others could do the same thing. It happened a lot. Often enough that said stores would be very profitable.

One of the features of these stores was that they would often charge fees when these videos were returned a day or more later than they were rented for. This was understandable, to a certain extent--Not having copies available of a certain movie that was in high demand cost the store money, and they were within their rights to expect their customers to make that up to them the next time they tried to rent a video.

But where Ballbuster Video went wrong was this: I returned a movie one day late one time. A few weeks later, I received in the mail a bill for $2 for my late fee.

No other video rental store on the planet had ever sent me a bill for a late fee. They all assumed (safely) that I would simply make it up to them the next time I rented a video, which I was willing to do.

My reaction? I immediately tore up my Bal--er, I mean Blockbuster Video card. I have never since rented a video from them, nor will I ever do so in the future. (I never paid the bill, by the way, and I never will)

Seriously. Think about it for a minute, Blockbuster. You sent me a bill for $2, and you lost a customer for life. And pause to think for a minute about the number of people I have told this story to over the last few decades, including the 3 readers of this blog.

You deserve to fail.

There is Truly no Limit...

...to how far Fox "News" will go...

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
A Farewell to Arms
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Tea Party

God bless Jon Stewart!

Thank You, Mr. Justice

I want to say thank you to retiring Justice John Paul Stevens. Thank you for his nearly four decades of service on the nation's highest court. Thank you for his valiant fight against an ever-encroaching right-wing agenda. It may be impossible to replace him.

But now that's out of the way, I have to point out something. His 90th birthday will be on April 20th. He has been on The Bench since I was in elementary school. The reason for this is that the framers of the constitution decided that Federal Judges should have lifetime appointments. In other words, they could hold their posts for as long as they lived, or until they alone decided it was time to step down, whichever came first. There are, of course, ways of removing a Federal judge from the bench by other means, but instances of this happening are few and far between.

The problem with this is obvious: When this was decided, a person living past the age of 55 was the exception, not the rule. A "lifetime" appointment could be expected to last 10 years at the outside. Nowadays, however, a person appointed to the Federal bench at age 40, for example, can be reasonably expected to be able to hold onto that post for 50 years or more, if he or she desires. In other words, said person will be able to hold onto their position of extreme power and influence for 5 decades or more. No one in this day and age should have that much power.

I am definitely NOT advocating elections for Federal judgeships--one need look no further than any of the states that elect judges to their positions to see what a disaster THAT would be. What I am advocating, as have many before me, are term limits for federal judges. A 10, 15, or 20 year term for a federal judge would be much more acceptable. That way, no judge ever has the ability to impose his or her personal ideology on a society that may have become radically opposed that personal ideology, for better or worse.

I know it's a pipe dream, but wouldn't it be nice?

The Mission

This morning I attended Easter Worship services at Christ Presbyterian Church (CPC) here in Toledo. At this point, I should point out that I am not a member of this church, but I have attended it many times before, mostly for convenience--the service is at 11 A.M., and I hate getting up early on the weekend. One of the things I happened to notice in the worship bulletin is the 5 parts of the Church's mission statement:

1) Belief and Hospitality: Believe in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, and graciously invite and welcome others into our community of faith.

2) Regular Worship: Attend worship every Sunday that you are in town.

3) Concern for others: Participate in at least 5 hours of service each year with a focus on caring for the poor, sick, and/or disadvantaged.

4) Faith Development: Participate in one small group or Bible study each year.

5) Generous giving: Give generously in the mission and ministry of CPC. Recommend giving at least 5% of household income, and work towards giving 10%

Fairly simple and straightforward. All derived from the various teachings of Jesus.

It got me thinking back to when I studied Islam back in school. One of the things I remembered was the 5 pillars of Islam. So I looked them up, and I would like to list them here. I have re-ordered them slightly from their traditionally listed order.

1) Shahadah: (Roughly translated) "[I profess that] There is no other God but Allah, and Muhammad is his Messenger." "Allah" means "God" in Arabic.

2) Salāt: The requirement that Muslims must pray five times per day.

3) Sawm (also known as Siyam): Ritual fasting during the holy month of Ramadan.

4) Hajj: The requirement of making a pilgrimage to Mecca at least once in your lifetime.

5) Zakāt: The requirement of giving alms to the poor. The standard rate is 2.5% of household income.

Now compare the two.

Really not all that different, are they?

Going Too Far.

It has happened. A Republican Florida doctor has decided to post a sign on his practice's door telling his patients that if they voted for Obama then they should seek care elsewhere.

I really don't know where to start.

Violating the Hippocratic oath?

Disregarding the needs of patients?

Being a total jackass?

I really want to send a message to Republicans. That message is this: You have got to stop embracing the extreme right. No matter how bad things got under the GW Bush administration, we progressives never became as vitriolic as you have become.

When you get to the point where your followers have decided that they will refuse their services to people they don't like, you have crossed a line. What's next? Separate entrances? Separate but equal?

Deja vu, anyone?

Arrested

As I write this, nine members of a "Christian" militia group have been arrested for allegedly plotting to first kill a police officer and to then kill many more--along with their families and friends--by planting bombs at the funeral of said officer.

The scariest part? These folks all lived within a 50 mile radius of me. This wasn't some isolated survivalist cult living in the mountains of Idaho or the deserts of New Mexico or Arizona--this was a group living in southern rural Michigan, less than 50 miles from 2 major urban population centers (Detroit and Toledo). A co-worker of mine lives less than 10 miles from where these arrests happened.

And these were not Muslim fanatics, born overseas and in this country on expired student visas. These were U.S. citizens, born right here, and educated--if that word can be used--right here.

These are AMERICAN CITIZENS who apparently have no problem with thinking that extreme violence against the government of the country they were born in is perfectly acceptable. I wonder what they would think about such a plot being hatched against American troops deployed in Iraq or Afghanistan.

But that's not the biggest irony in this whole affair. No. The biggest irony is that all nine of the defendants have asked to be represented by public defenders. These nine people. who seem to despise the government and everything it stands for, have no problem with that very government defending their rights.

To paraphrase quotes from The West Wing*:

"What do you say about a government that defends the rights of all of its citizens, even when they want to destroy it?"
"God Bless America".

Amen.

*Check out Season 2, Episode 3

In Memoriam

Robert Martin Culp--August 16, 1930 – March 24, 2010

Most folks who are, on average, about 10 years or more older than me, will remember him as the star of I Spy, the TV show that is perhaps best known as being the first network TV show to feature a black actor (Bill Cosby) in a leading role. It was the show that launched Cosby's career.

I mostly remember him from his role as FBI agent Bill Maxwell in The Greatest American Hero, a TV show probably better known for it's title song than anything else (Believe it or Not)

But to a much younger generation, he will be forever known for a far more obscure, and yet also far more notorious role: The voice of the evil Dr. Wallace Breen, the puppet administrator of post-invasion Earth installed by the Combine between the events of the FPS games Half-Life and Half-Life 2. Few game villains have ever been more reviled--a sleazy, smarmy opportunist who manipulated events that took place after Earth was conquered by invading aliens to seize the kind of power he never would have gained otherwise. (For those non gamer-speak savvy folks, FPS stands for First Person Shooter.)

It's a role that probably gained him more fame than he ever got from his other roles. After all, Half-Life became one of the most popular FPS games in history, and its sequel, Half-Life 2 and its follow-up episodes became one of the biggest sellers in video game history, and it earned over 40 Game of the Year awards. I'm not ashamed to admit I played the game. I still play it on a regular basis. It's one of those games that never gets boring.

It may not be the greatest legacy in the world to be known to gamers far and wide as the voice of one of the biggest villains ever created, but I think he probably enjoyed the notoriety.

Farewell Dr. Breen!

There was no one that we members of the human resistance loved to hate more than you!

How Far Will They Go?

Teabagger activists posted the home address of Democratic Congressman Tom Periello on the web and told people to "stop by and thank him" for his yes vote on the Health care reform bill.

Apparently someone took this advice at face value. At this address, the main gas line that feeds the house was found cut.

One problem: The address they posted was not the Congressman's but his brother's. A married man with 4 young children.

I have been increasingly concerned about the Tea(bag) Party. It was Mahatma Gandhi that once said, "First they ignore, you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win."

Well, first we ignored them. Then we laughed at them. Now we are fighting them.

The difference, however, between the Mahatma's situation and ours, is that he was fighting for a good cause. He was fighting for the independence of his country, against a tyrannical colonial power that was oppressing his people.

In this case, however, progressives are fighting against a health care system that has placed profit over people. We are fighting against a health care system that can drop you from coverage the moment you get an illness that might cost them too much money. We are fighting against people who are opposed to big government spending only when a Democrat controls the White House. And we are fighting against people who are in favor of states seceding from the union, and who seem to like it when an AMERICAN CITIZEN loads a small plane full of too much gasoline and crashes it into a Federal government office!

These people are NOT on the side of good, or right. There is nothing about these people that is to be admired. And we cannot lose the fight against them.