Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Utterly Ridiculous

The NCAA has announced its sanctions of Ohio State today. Among others, OSU is prevented from playing a bowl game in 2013, and they lose 3 scholarships per year for the next 3 years.

All because 5 players sold memorabilia that they EARNED to a shady character because it was the only way they could see to make a profit of the INDENTURED SERVITUDE that was forced upon them by the ridiculous NCAA rules they have to abide by--Namely: College athletes receive NO monetary payment of any kind.

Baseball players go into the Major Leagues right out of High school. Basketball players spend only a year in college before being draft eligible. And that's only because CBS wanted to make sure that their ratings for the NCAA tournament broadcast stayed high.

I realize that football is different. It only takes one play for a top college athlete to go from top prospect to undraftable due to injury. And the average career for an NFL player lasts 4 years.

But the NFL enjoys an advantage that no other Pro sport has: The free Minor League system that the NCAA provides. And if the top athletes of the NCAA don't like the teams that draft them, they have almost no way of escaping them.

So when the NCAA punished an entire program for the actions of a few players, they merely reinforced their hypocrisy.

I sincerely hope that whoever was responsible for these sanctions spends an eternity burning in hell. And I hope that the OSU athletic director joins them. Instead of appealing them, he will make the school bend over and take it. And tell them "Thank you Sir, may I have another?!"

Sad. These guys sold memorabilia they had earned. They didn't party with hookers on yacht parties organized by drug dealing boosters, or rape young men in the shower.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

My New Favorite Word!

Today I came across a new word, and it has officially become my new favorite word of all time:


Don't you just love the way that rolls off your tongue?

And while I can't claim credit for inventing the word, I would like to make a stab at giving it an official definition. So, without further ado, here goes:

(Clears throat)

Tee * HAHD * Ist (n.): An uninformed member of the American voting public (usually a Republican, but not always) who believes that the teachings of the secret corporate creators of the American TEA party should be followed 100% without deviation, even when those teachings are designed to harm the very people that follow them. (emphasis added).

How about it? I mean, what is really the difference between a person described above and an actual Islamic Jihadist? Do not both follow the misguided directives of those in power who have taken a mostly benevolent organization and twisted its teachings in order to achieve their own sinister objectives?

The only difference I can see is that the corporate organizers of the TEA party are far more sinister than their Muslim counterparts, for the damage they can achieve can be far greater and far longer lasting (see "George W. Bush, Presidential administration of". See also "2008, Great Recession of", and "Election, 2010 Congressional").

Also, neither the Teahadist nor the Jihadist can be persuaded to change their views via logic, reason, or any other form of intellectual argument. And they believe so strongly in their cause that they are willing to do almost anything to further it.

Teahadist, by the way, replaces my old favorite word:

In * ter * nut (n.) 1. Any person who takes any information they receive via electronic mail or read on the internet as the absolute gospel truth without checking to see if the information is at all factual. 2. Any person who immediately spreads such information to as many others as possible without first checking to see if it has any basis whatsoever in fact.

I claim credit for inventing THAT word, as well as its definitions.

Sunday, December 04, 2011

Just When I Think We've Hit Rock Bottom...

Someone hands us a jackhammer and we start digging deeper.

By now, you've surely heard about what happened with the Coca-Cola company's campaign in support of the Polar Bears. If you haven't, well, if I really have to tell you people again that I ain't your damn search engine, then you really should stop reading this blog!

The gist of it is that when Coke decided to do a limited marketing run in support of the Polar Bears' habitat, one of the things they did was to offer Regular Coke in a white can. For each can purchased, the CC corporation would donate to the World Wildlife Fund's efforts to save the Polar Bears' habitats.

The first problem encountered was when folks bought these drinks thinking that they were Diet Coke. Folks, apparently, can't tell the difference between silver and white. They also can't realize that if the word "Diet" doesn't appear on the can, it's not Diet.

The second problem encountered was when folks apparently decided that the drink tasted differently, despite it being the exact same drink.

So the white cans are DOA. I managed to secure a case of the white cans before they disappeared from the shelves. Maybe they'll be collector's items someday.

By the way, I've tasted the white can Coke. It tastes EXACTLY the same. Strong, bitter, sugary, and able to remove rust from a car bumper.

(OK not really, but that's what has been claimed in the past)

And Coke is back in the red cans. And I continue to weep for the dying IQ of this nation.